Both
Co-Pilot Robert F. Toner and Tech. Sgt. Harold J. Ripslinger
possessed small
pocket-sized date-book type journals in which daily entries were
kept. These items were found in association with their remains
and faithfully chronicle the crews actions from the day of
the
mission
until 8 to 9 days after bailout.
It
can never be known for certain exactly how long any or all of
the crew lived... but
their condition
as
described in the last few entries indicate this was not
much longer than shortly after the entries
cease.
Both LBG authors McClendon and Martinez, (for
well executed and understandably interpretive literary reasons),
added a bit of dialogue and some likely behaviors for the crew
during these days in their books. Though well researched and useful
in
enriching the story of the LGB's crew, the hard fact
remains
that these few diary entries, along with the artifacts found
with the crew's remains and
along
the
path of
their
trek, are the only hard
evidence we have of the thoughts, activities,
and theoretical interactions or dialogue of the crew during
their desert
ordeal.
We
may ponder such things as... What did they talk about to break
the monotony while walking
or resting? What was the mood of the men and how did it change
as they went along? Did they tell jokes, talk of home, or
just remain
silent to conserve energy?
Was
there
any conflict
of
interest
about
the ways
to proceed, or animosity for instance toward
navigator
Hays
for
for some real or imagined lack of performance during the
mission...and a thousand more. There is no evidence in the journals
or artifacts
recovered to disprove that they acted in any way other than
that of a cool, co-operative team, focusing simply on their immediate
survival... but there is no evidence to prove
it either. The comment and two questions found scribbled in John Woravka's
notebook when his body was recovered intimate there may have
been some kind of conflict
during the mission, so one must keep an open mind. We
shall never really
know.
All
that can be known is
what can be analyzed or extracted from these fleeting
but valuable pieces
of information. One
thing is certain. When first released to the press, these
brief yet
descriptive
entries,
written
by these two
hopeful, haunted, but ultimately doomed
men, did
more
to propel
the LGB
saga into that of legend than perhaps anything else.
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What conversations, interactions, or lack there of that transpired between the crew while attempting to walk out of the desert are beyond history's reach...those details are lost to time. Nobody will ever know. Yet both
diaries exhibit similarities that illuminate a few things that can
be assumed have been experienced by the group as a whole:
("Day 1"
is herein considered to be Monday, April 5th, their first actual
"day" in the desert.)
In the
first three days the entries seem relatively routine in their matter
of fact way of recording simply what the group DID, not how they
FELT,
as if
it were assumed (or hoped at least) it was going to be a matter
of time before they
were either rescued or were
able to make it back to the coast by walking. When
or how their initial assumption of their probable location and
how it may have changed in terms of their presumptive distance
from their base at Soluch, and when and how that may have eventually
altered their hope for rescue is unclear. By Day 4 however, they were beginning to physically deteriorate at a rapid pace and must have begun to consider rescue as being a potentially forgone hope.
Both diaries
indicate that by the 4th day out, Thursday the 8th, serious exhaustion
was taking place among the group. Both diaries mention "all wanting to die" by day 5, Friday the 9th,
the first mention of this being in relation to an excruciatingly
hot afternoon
on that day. How both Toner and Ripslinger came to understand
the "mutual" nature
of this wish among the group can only be surmised. One may
assume they were able to vocalize
their collective misery to each other in a way that was brutally
frank.
Ripslinger
mentions "Can't
hold out much longer without aid" on
day 4, Thursday the 8th...and Toner
mentions on day 7, Sunday the 11th, "could
make it if we had water"
clearly illustrating that as early as day 4
they were fully aware of the potentially fatal predicament the were
facing.
On day 3, Wednesday the 7th, Toner mentions
"prayers all the time". He twice again refers to prayers,
and Ripslinger writes simply
"Pray" at the end of Thursday the 8th's entry. Toner's
entry,
"Still
having prayer meetings for help" on Saturday
the 10th, comes after Friday's mention of Shelley, Ripslinger
and Moore separating from the rest. Since Ripslinger doesn't
mention that he, Shelley, and Moore separated
until his
Saturday
the 10th's entry, it's unclear if the "prayer meetings" were
first initiated by the group as a whole or were performed only
by
the five remaining behind after they had left. Note however that
the word
"Still" in Toner's entry indicates they were meeting
in prayer before the entry occurred. It seems tempting
if not logical to therefore conclude they had all participated
in at least one if not more formal prayer meetings before
the separation.
Throughout the pages of both diaries no more
than the allotted space for each days entry was used. Even toward
the end, both Toner and Ripslinger did not write more than what
could fit in the allotted diary space for that days entry. Even when the
hope
of rescue seems to have been all but
foregone, they kept their entries short and to the point. Though
each had ample room, and presumably many extra pages to write a "farewell" message
to loved ones, or other personal thoughts toward the end, both seemed to
have resisted writing outside the margins of each days allotted
few lines. One could argue that the hope for, or at least the "idea" of
rescue,
was always very much in their minds. Or just perhaps, they consciously (or subconsciously) felt that writing anything else besides the daily entries they'd been accustomed to, indeed writing anything outside the current day's alloted space would somehow doom them, would in effect "jinx" the possibility of rescue, even if only through the simple act of literary self resignation. Whatever the case may be, given the intensity of emotions and personal interactions they must have experienced individually and as a group in their final days, it makes their all to brief descriptions of each days experiences frustratingly cryptic to those wishing to unravel the story at length.
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